My first permit picture that was taken when I was 16 featured me with no makeup and a black eye given to me by @emilyhynes28 after she thought I swung her too high on the swing. She knocked me to the ground, and ended up kicking my glasses into my face. I hated that picture. It was embarrassing. My hair looked dumb, my face was bare and bruised, and I wanted no one to see this major disaster on what I assumed would be the most important piece of plastic ever. My license picture was taken not too long after that. I somehow wore the same shirt to take it though. I straightened my hair and put on mascara like a real woman. But first I had to pass the test. It was a Louisiana July day. I had to take the test in my new to me Oldsmobile my grandfather gave me. The car smelled of cigarettes, The a/c vents were broken, and it had been baking for two hours in the sun as we waited for the test lady to come back from lunch. When she did, she called me up and told me how she didn’t want to be there. She got in my car and told me it reeked of cigs and was hot and she needed the window down. I apologized and rolled down the window. I fastened my seat belt in a panic, and started the car. “What are you doing?!? You can’t drive with the damn window down!” On the verge of panic attack tears, I rolled up the window. I had to go through the stop sign, a light, and the turn lane to get back to the service road with the lady’s “this car smells so bad” chorus on repeat. Then I had to park. Since it was so sunny and hot, I asked if I could pull past the spot to get in the shade. She approved. Then she told me “honey I should fail you since you can’t park in the spot, but I don’t want to sit in this car no more.” I felt hot and defeated and self conscious about it all. I took my picture without the lady even telling me she was taking it. She handed the card to me. My eyes were half open, I had panicked eyes, and lovely flushed cheeks. TOTAL EMBARRASSMENT. Today, I got to redo it all as a grown comedian who realizes nothing matters. Open mouth smile, dead eye, golf shirt, and a sad grown out mullet makes art! LETS HIT SOME BARS/GET PULLED OVER TEXAS STYLE (in 7-10 days)!!!