Love saving lives.
Love saving lives.
As children our escape was the out doors, for many as we grew older it became our drug of choice. The outdoors never tore up my family, never made my mom cry, never stole from my family. It's safe to say some escapes are better than others. I've gone back to escaping in nature.
The night time is the hardest for me. As the sun and the noise of the day gives way to the darkness and quiet of the night my mind begins to turn on itself. I think, I’ve had a really rough day, you know what would be great, a beer. I dwell on the thought for a moment and then I think about the second one. This tape plays out in my head like a car crash reel in slow motion and sure enough the night ends with me in queens happily giving everything I have for one hit of what I really want. I think, maybe I can control it. Maybe this time will be different. But in my heart I know it won’t be. It may take a day, a month, or a year but it’ll be the same every time. This is the daily struggle for an addict. These demons never go away, we just learn how to cope with them. Don’t judge me, don’t pity me, don’t reject me, just know that my name is joe and I’m an addict that now knows how to deal with my demons.
👨👦Please like and share 👨👦 Happy Friday Interventions on fathers in active addiction are the most emotional for me. Look at your child, your legacy, your pride and joy. As a father my goal is to make sure that the little boy in this picture has a life much better than mine. How can I give that to him if I'm not being the best version of me? I understand the selfishness that comes with addiction, what I don't understand is how that doesn't dissipate when hearing an "I love you daddy", or when your child smiles at you, how could I teach this boy to be better than me if I'm not setting the best example for him? Like I said interventions on fathers in active addiction are the most emotional for me. But I'll be damned if I don't do every one I can. #lihelps #eddiehaar
There's something to be said about going to the gym. Most people will give you simple reasons why they go, to look better, to be healthy, to lose some weight. Yes all those things are important. Most people don't mention the deeper reasons behind it. Endorphins, sounder mental health, proving to yourself that you are determined, dedicated and focused on what you want. That even when you don't want to do something, you push yourself because you have goals. See going to the gym can easily be related to recovery. Go every day, you'll feel better, you'll look better, it will get easier. Stop going for a month, watch how quickly things get heavier, you get more lethargic, you lose the Endorphins and slide off into depression. Eventually you just stop going. That my friends is how a relapse happens.
Lou and I grew up together. We smoked weed together, we hit bars together, we snorted Coke together, we shot heroin together, and we were homeless together. We went in and out of recovery for years as we battled our addictions. Today we are clean together, and we spend all of our time helping families overcome addiction through that same process. Our family support meeting is tonight at 7 pm. The address is 1001 Stewart Ave Bethpage, NY 11714. We look forward to seeing you all there. Feel free to share this post to some families in need. Love Kevin and Louie — with @louiehelps @itskevinalter
Am I grateful? Grateful is an understatement! I hope everyone has a thanksgiving they can remember. I’ve shared thanksgivings with men who will never see the light of day facing life in prison. I’ve shared thanksgivings with homeless men who didn’t care or even know it was a day to be grateful. I’ve shared thanksgiving alone. I’ve shared thanksgiving with young men and women who are no longer here due to a disease they couldn’t keep in remission. So when you’re sitting at your dining room table and you glance around at your beautiful family, be grateful, be grateful to have this moment. #HappyThanksGiving #LIHelps
People say marijuana is a harmless drug. “It comes from the earth, it’s a plant, and everyone smokes it.” You know what else comes from the earth? Coca and Poppy plants. My friends and I were of the belief that everyone smoked pot too when we were kids. We just assumed that what we were doing would have no affect on our lives long term. Unfortunately, we couldn’t have been more wrong. This picture is taken in 2003, and I am 15 years old. The kid in the back could be anywhere today. I have no idea where he is. The guy to my left however was my best friend Joe. Joe and I built ramps as kids, raced go-karts, detailed cars, played sports, and wreaked havoc on anyone we could. At 14 or 15 years old our new hobby became smoking weed together. Then it was doing cocaine, and Xanax. Eventually it was heroin. The reason you don’t see Joe in any pictures with me today is because he lost his battle with addiction a couple of years ago. As a kid you always think you’re invincible. As a kid you always think you know something. Turned out we didn’t know anything. I got lucky, and Joe’s luck ran out. It’s that simple. RIP Joe #KevinAlter #TheAddictsDiary @itskevinalter
This is Jace, Jace is 3 years old and I’ve explained addiction to him already. He doesn’t hear the gore details or the language I would use to address a college panel. He may not completely understand what it is, how it works, or the outcomes it can cause. I emotionally connect with him by using what’s important in his life. I use his toys, a show he likes, or a cartoon character. I explain that if any of those were bad for him uncle Louie wouldn’t let him play with the toys or watch that show. I pinch him and we both say “ouch”, I say “do you want me to do that again?”, he says “no”. I tell him me either and we don’t do anything that can hurt ourselves or our family. I’m preparing and I hope you are to. #LIHelps #addiction #prevention
Imagine the one thing you absolutely love to do was swept away like sand in a hurricane. Imagine everything you know and worship was crushed to smithereens. Imagine the best physical feeling you’ve ever experienced was no longer an option. Imagine the life you knew and grew to own was proven to be a complete lie. Picture the only thing you sought to find when happy, sad, angry, alone, or fearful had disappeared before your eyes. That’s how I felt when I first got sober. Being stripped of the only thing capable of making me comfortable mentally, emotionally, and physically. The appropriate word is vulnerable! So something has to fill the void correct? I’ll keep it simple, if you’re an addict and searching for what will fill that void, it’s you. You’ve been missing “you” for so long masked behind a bag of dope, bottle of booze, or a xanax bar. So now you don’t have that one thing you think you love but has ironically ruined your life. How hard would you work for that next bag, bottle, or prescription pill? I suggest you work just as hard to find yourself. This means reading, therapy, self-help meetings, smart meetings, sober support networking, etc. Well that’s what I did but what do I know, I only have 5 years recovered. #LIHelps #recovery #workhard #writersofinstagram #writing #writerscommunity #addiction
I roll up my sleeve to the top of my shoulder, tie the top of my bicep off with the seatbelt and wait as the circulation to my vein makes it bulge out of my arm to become visible. I’ve been using heroin for 5 years now and I am seasoned to the operation of shooting heroin. The whole process takes me a matter of a minute and thirty seconds. I rip the bags, pour them into the Poland spring bottle cap, add water, stir, place the cotton in the cap, draw back with the syringe, flick the air bubbles out of the syringe, slap my vein, insert the needle in my vein, draw back the plunger, blood rushes back into the syringe (meaning I hit the vein), and shoot the heroin into my bloodstream. The physical feeling heroin creates is as if naked in the dead of winter and you’re wrapped in a blanket fresh out of the dryer. Its undeniably the best physical feeling I’ve ever felt and I’ve heard countless heroin addicts say the same thing. I guess I can admit if there wasn’t such terrible consequences id use heroin everyday. The problem is I end up overdosing, in jail, in front of psychiatrists diagnosing my mental health issues, stealing from my family, homeless, institutionalized, and on the brink of committing suicide. People ask why we write so vividly about our experiences. Its not just for the audience but more important for myself. I was terrified to get sober and stop the only thing I thought filled my voids and made me feel better. Im more terrified to forget how miserable I was, how miserable I made my family, how close I was to hanging up the gloves to the fight of my life. This is my story, this is my legacy, this is how I remember. In the depths of the deepest dwellings of my addiction I remember planning my own wake and funeral. Now I plan to lend my hand to the next addict or alcoholic feeling desperately hopeless. As I extend my hand I say “hi I’m louie and I’m an addict”. #LIHelps #addiction #recovery #writersofinstagram #writer #TheAddictPoet follow @louiehelps
There was a time I️ wasn’t allowed in this room and even more disheartening, they didn’t want me there. Family get togethers we’re off limits to me when I️ was actively sticking a needle in my arm. I had grown to accept that due to the fact I’d rob and steal from you without a conscious thought of it being wrong to do so. Now I️ am trusted not only to be in the room but to operate the camera. As I️ ran around the house conspiring the perfect picture it hit me, I’ve become the glue that holds together my family. I’ve become a therapeutic influence for my families problems. I️ gratefully accept these responsibility’s because it’s better then being a junkie. Thanks for listening, love Louie. #lihelps
❤️Please Share❤️ For years the only relationship i had with my mom was a “safe call” from a treatment center, or when she would drop off a bag of food or sheets at whatever rat hole halfway house i was staying in. i gave her a key to my new house when i moved in and she’s been over constantly helping me decorate. She just keeps saying the same thing, “I never thought this day would come. I thought you’d be living on a bunk bed or in a shelter somewhere forever.” If I’m completely honest with myself, I never thought the day would come either. My mom deserves moments like this. It’s been a long road, but it was worth it. #KevinAlter #TheAddictsDiary #lihelps
❤️❤️❤️SHARE❤️❤️❤️SHARE❤️❤️❤️ When most people turn their back, ill look you right in your eyes. When the world feels cold, Ill light your passion with my fire. When you feel you are all alone, I’ll show you my hand. When you believe there is no hope, I’ll tell you my story. When all you can see is dark, I’ll be the light at the end of the tunnel. When the devil shows you what’s wrong, I’ll be your angel for what’s right. When the track marks are leading down your arm, I’ll lead you to recovery. When the drug dealer calls your name, I’ll answer with mine. When you feel exposed, I’ll show you my shield. When you don’t want to fight, I’ll fight for you. This is my promise, love Louie. #lihelps