So this is a bit of a strange one. It's by no means a beg for attention or trying to reel in the likes. So on Tuesday I was diagnosed with depression. It wasn't a shock, I've been diagnosed with various levels of depression over the years and learnt in small ways to handle it. But this time I knew things were different. For the past 3 months I've been having anxiety attacks, episodes where I just burst into tears on public transport after work for no real reason (I love my job and see myself as extremely fortunate). Trouble sleeping. Feeling worthless, almost to the point of being sick by what I saw in the mirror. I began to loose weight (which I need to do) by just not eating. Zero appetite. Every day felt like a genuine struggle, and what made it harder was that nobody knew. Some people might be reading thing and think "what the fuck harry just speak to me if you need to!". I know a lot of it came from the breakup with my boyfriend. I was so smitten. I was so happy. I was going to propose on his birthday in October. Life in general has been a difficult daily challenge. It is so incredibly exhausting pretending to be okay. And after spending more years than I'd of liked in the closet, I've been accustomed to pretending things are fine when actually they're not. The reason I wanted to share this was because I only really saw how tough the past few months had been once I spoke to someone. It had become my normal. Bang on the dot 6pm on train home starting to cry. Being in a dark place became routine and thus, normal. When I told someone for the first time what I've been experiencing and feeling, it shook me up. Made me realise I wasn't alone and didn't need to deal with it alone. Ive been to the doctor, signed off work, given time and support from colleagues, family and friends to handle this sickness properly. If anyone is feeling like they're in a dark place, just say something. Speak to somebody. Even if you pull the short straw and speak to me. Someone will listen, and things can and will get better.