Weird picture? Yeah, I know. The experience was weird to match the snap shot. Thing is, this isn’t even the half of it, this was BEFORE the helmet, the mouth guard, and the magnetic pulses to my brain that quickly wiped that smile right off of my mug. Today’s experience was frightening but hopeful all at the same time. I started TMS therapy today, transcranial magnetic stimulation to be exact. It’s a somewhat unknown therapy to treat Major Depressive Disorder. I don’t even think most of my dearest friends know this, but I had my first suicidal attempt when I was 15 years old, and numerous others from there, why I choose to share this now on this platform, I am not exactly sure, but it feels right so, yeah. Maybe it’s for my own therapy, maybe to give someone else hope, I’m not sure, but here it is. We all have our fights to fight, I don’t pretend mine is anything bigger or heavier than yours, it’s just mine. Major depression is like this black cloud that circles from my heart and up around my head. It’s this pressure on my chest that makes it hard to breath, to want to wake up and move, to feel any worth. It’s this trickster that says, “Hey, you’re such a mess, everyone around you would probably be a whole lot better if you just went away. You’d be doing them a favor. Just let go. Stop fighting.” Thing is, it’s a son of a bitch. And it’s a liar. After all the major lows, therapy and meds started on and off at age 19. They have their time and their place, well, I actually believe everyone should have a good therapist at some point in their lives, but the thing with meds—-the thing with meds is they have SIDEFFECTS. So. Many. And sometimes the side effects are totally worth it. Sometimes people don’t really struggle with them. And, praise be, sometimes meds saved me. But I got so tired of them after 15 years, on and off, on and off. And I heard about this, #TMS , this potentially long term plan to relieve me from my black cloud. It’s a long process. 5 days a week for about 9 weeks, 30 minute sessions...(Continued in Comments)
Always exciting to see how my customers decorate their house. These folks take the cake! I love working for people who appreciate #natural #beauty . The best wonders are #natural #earthly #wonders #idaho #gems #stones #crystals I wish we could have #inlaid something like this into the #floor !!!
Not even crying about the muscle gains I have seen in 4 short weeks! 🙌🏻💪🏻 • I am gearing up to start my Next wave 🌊 of on this program in another week. I know school is starting and life is going to be crazy—-but Sister, You can do this 4 DAYS a week from home. Seriously. 4 days. EASY & flexible meal plan. You know where to find me. 💌 #wednesdaywisdom #progressnotperfection #4weeksin #4weekstogo #fitforfall #fallfitness